Shifting Relationship to Partnership

Hello Beautiful Infinite Beings!

I have been doing a lot of new inner work with the Divine Mother in the last three months. One of the things She has brought to my attention is the word "partnership" and it's distinctive meaning. Goddess invited me to consider the distinction between what it means to be in relationship, as well as what it means to be in partnership. I sat with each word and contemplated all the associations I have with each word.

As I sat with the word relationship, I noticed there is an inherent lack of choice hidden in that word for me and it is experienced as kind of a "static" given. In other-words, it conjures for me a set of governing rules that I have unconsciously adopted from my family, friends, peers, and the mainstream media. These rules were inherited, not consciously chosen by me. They answer the question, "Who or what am I ... in relation to - that over there. How will I respond to "that over there." It seems to draw lines of separation and urge me to compare this to that, myself to them, the past with the present, and the present with my imaginings of the future. It has a static quality that demands its use in any situation - regardless of the subtle nuances of my here/now experience. It conjures for me a sense of helplessness, lack of personal contemplation, and personal choice. It also seems to bear a sense of duty. Like, "I don't like this but this is what is RIGHT to do." This notion offends my soul.

As I sat with this new word, partnership, a very different set of associations revealed themselves to me. I could see that partnership is inclusive and generates harmony, sharing, flow, commitment, peace, happiness, co-creation, care, attentiveness, responsible stewardship, and active choice. For me, partnership is a set of agreements I have thoughtfully and consciously entered into with myself for how I will co-create with all aspects of myself and the world around me. It honors connection by acknowledging that how I think and choose to act - affects everything around me ... because it is all a part of me and I a part of it. Everything I create, be it words, actions, non-actions, or choices generates consequences for myself and everything else.

So, I began to exchange the word relationship for partnership. When I did this, it transformed how I see and hold my world. It infused me with a deeper understanding of my own responsibility and accountability for what I create. Now I create partnership with all aspects of myself and my life. I have a partnership of emotion which has transformed the way I experience even the most unsavory of these.

For example, I have created and developed a partnership with my fears. Instead of experiencing fear as an undesirable emotion, I now have a relation to it of partnership where it acts as an ally to signal me it is time to shift my awareness.

Sometimes this shift is aimed at creating actions which will transform an area of my life that is out of balance. Other times it acts as a signal to me that I have climbed aboard the worry-go-round and am future-casting or living in a past experience. It reminds me that I have shifted out of the now and allows me to choose to come back into the present moment. When in the present moment, it becomes clear that the fear is unsubstantiated. What was true then, is not true here and now. Just because it was true then, does not in any way mean it is or will be true now. I have choice. I am a powerful creator and I may choose to create my experiences any way I desire. I am not at the effect of my story. I begin from a deep internal sense of Whole and Complete, and I move my energy out into the world through my creations. The outcome I have experienced in the past, is free to be just that. (a past experience)

Goddess showed me that partnership transforms any emotion previously experienced as undesirable, into a powerful ally.

What are some of the ways in which you have transformed difficult emotions into allies?

OR

In what areas of your life experience do you consciously create partnership and when did that way of BEING with your own life begin? How were you introduced to it?

Copyright © 2012 Sophlili Achnil for Xstatic Now

Finally I Give in to my Heart

His love falls softly into my heart. It reaches every nook and cranny, every aching place, every particle of hope, every forgotten dream, every burgeoning  expression of my own love. It soothes and whispers to all of me ... inviting a different experience ... inviting my vulnerability.

I'm standing in the kitchen, hands on either side of the sink, heart in a knot, tears just below the surface - tears that won't come. My throat aches with them and it feels like a plum pit has somehow become lodged there. I want it gone. Every part of me is involved in the experience of sorrow and the rage I've carried for four years. I want to be angry. Anger stuffs sadness under the rug. I want ... ohh I don't know what I want. I just don't want to feel this rage. I want peace.

He tells me I've already overcome it ... I'm overcoming it now.

"No I'm not. I haven't dealt with it at all. That's why it's still here. That's why I feel this way. But it's different now. It feels somehow different - like the lid has blown off the pressure cooker and it's all right here, it's all I can see and feel. I don't want this ... I want to be done with it."

 I look up ... across the pass-through counter to him. He's sitting at our dining table. Our eyes connect and I "feel" his love pour into me through them. A part of me wants to turn away ... avert my gaze. It's too hard to let myself be softened. It scares me.

I give in to this fear and go back to cooking our meal ... try to forget ... to distract myself ... to stuff these thoughts and feelings.

Bless his beautiful heart, I should have known he wouldn't let that happen. I turn and he's there. He wraps his arms around me and simply says "I love you."

Something about the way he says it always transforms it from simple words into a healing balm. I feel it. I know it. I can't avoid it ..... and I'm so, so grateful for that.

I cling to him, feeling, reeling, and finally I give in to my heart. I sit down on its throne and all at once the immediate pain subsides. Just like that. I smile at him, he smiles back. He goes back to his work, and I to mine.

I'm standing at the sink again. I think of the water ... live giving ... healing. It's like love ... there's no place it can't go and no thing that will not give way to it's path. Even stone, given time will yield the path for water to travel. My heart feels like that stone tonight, and even it must yield the path for love.

I called this man to me before we even met. I called this love and summoned it forth. I am ready for it. I am willing to heal.

I think sometimes when we resist love, it's not because we "want" to resist it. It's because we want to see what will happen when we do. What will our own heart say? It's kind of like our way of checking weather we are truly ready or not. If we resist our own vulnerability and opening with our actions, will our heart speak up and say ... "I'm no longer willing to resist. I am ready to open."

If you are ready to open your heart more fully too, here are a few things I'm doing that may also support you in your own process:


An Open Heart Holds the Key to Healing
"Until we see with the eyes of the Heart, listen to the roar of the world through the ears of the Heart, and peer into the future with the comprehension of the Heart, we can never know a thing, nor will we ever be whole. The Heart unites us all, regardless of our differences, in this common understanding, and brings compassion to our troubled world. " - Agni Yoga teaching


Yoga that Opens the Heart 
Gentle backbends are a great way to encourage the heart to open as they open the front-body, including your heart, chest, throat, etc. These may be done with the support of blocks and bolsters if you choose. Bridge Pose is my favorite! It really opens me up.

A few other options include fish pose, dhanurasa, and urdhva dhanurasana.

Adding a mantra of your making, or holding an empowering image in your minds eye will really bring a rich fullness to your experience. Mine is simple: "I Am Ready to Open My Heart", and I envision a sunflower. (I used to pretend I was a sunflower growing and reaching for the sun when I was little) It connects me with my child heart.

Vibrational Allies
Working with crystals and gemstones is a great support to me. I use Emerald  & Rose Quartz together. The heart chakra resonates well to the colors of green and pink. Pink stones, such as rose quartz, resonate with the "higher" heart, or thymus chakra and assist in ones receptiveness to divine love, forgiveness, and the release of fear. Green emeralds have a lovely heart based energy and are a powerful aid for women as they bring through Goddess energy. These green stones also help us step more fully into feelings of unconditional love and compassion.

Archangel Chamuel: The Loving One
Another fabulous support to you may be found in working with Archangel Chamuel. This is the archangel of the pink ray of divine love. Simply a light one or more pink candles, hold some rose quartz, and begin praying to Chamuel. Alternatively you may lay back in a comfortable position and place the rose quartz upon your heart chakra.