Mini Series: Shifting Shame to Empowerment - Free Your Inner Greatness

Hello Beautiful Infinite Beings!

Negative self talk is very common for many people in the world today. Shame is a common theme. While on the outside many people may seem well packaged and put together, deep within is a rather active judge who takes a critical eye to every action and in-action.

We have all experienced Judge Shame to one degree or another. In some cases, shame can get so powerful, it actually drives our lives. This is clearly evident when we explore our inner dialog. Exploring your inner dialog is something you can do for yourself. If you see yourself on a regular basis as worthless, an idiot unworthy of love, respect, affection, or success, this is a clear indicator that Judge Shame has moved in and now directs most every facet of your life. When it becomes this pervasive, it can be difficult to see just how deeply rooted shame has become. It acts like a strangling vine that moves through our inner landscape and wraps its tendrils around our beauty, power to create, and our joy. It does not have to be this way.

If Judge Shame is strangling the joy out of your life, you need not feel trapped with no way out. You can shift your experience from suffering to empowerment with a few simple tools. The first tool we are going to look at in this series is our "attention."

The first tool we can pick up and put to use is our attention. Engaging in the activity of "active attention" (noticing) is the first step. Nothing more; just simply notice. Make a conscious agreement with yourself - in this very moment - to simply "Notice" your inner dialog as often as it is possible for you to do so. Don't trouble yourself at this point with "doing" anything about the things you notice. Simply "noticing" will set things in motion. With practice, your "noticing" skills will increase over time. There is nothing else to do at this point. Anyone can do this. All it takes is "willingness" on your part.

I won't kid you though, if you are serious about shifting from shame to empowerment, you're going to have to want it like you want air. You are going to have to want it so much that even on those days where you are sick to death of noticing this stuff about yourself, you generate a willingness to continue doing it anyway. Simple; not easy.

What should I be noticing?
Begin to notice what your inner dialog is every time you experience fear, failure, rejection, anger, or sadness. Notice, when you say things like, "I am so: stupid, careless, worthless, crazy, or useless." Notice what shows up in your inner dialog when you use the words: "can't, won't, try, just, maybe, if, only, because, why, or but."

If you would like to shift your experience from shame to empowerment, decide today to begin practicing your noticing skills and follow along here as we unpack and move through the stages of this powerful shift!

Stay tuned to this powerful series as Sophlili Achnil of Xstatic Now shares the actions and tools she has discovered along her own journey from shame to Freeing Your Inner Greatness!

Finally I Give in to my Heart

His love falls softly into my heart. It reaches every nook and cranny, every aching place, every particle of hope, every forgotten dream, every burgeoning  expression of my own love. It soothes and whispers to all of me ... inviting a different experience ... inviting my vulnerability.

I'm standing in the kitchen, hands on either side of the sink, heart in a knot, tears just below the surface - tears that won't come. My throat aches with them and it feels like a plum pit has somehow become lodged there. I want it gone. Every part of me is involved in the experience of sorrow and the rage I've carried for four years. I want to be angry. Anger stuffs sadness under the rug. I want ... ohh I don't know what I want. I just don't want to feel this rage. I want peace.

He tells me I've already overcome it ... I'm overcoming it now.

"No I'm not. I haven't dealt with it at all. That's why it's still here. That's why I feel this way. But it's different now. It feels somehow different - like the lid has blown off the pressure cooker and it's all right here, it's all I can see and feel. I don't want this ... I want to be done with it."

 I look up ... across the pass-through counter to him. He's sitting at our dining table. Our eyes connect and I "feel" his love pour into me through them. A part of me wants to turn away ... avert my gaze. It's too hard to let myself be softened. It scares me.

I give in to this fear and go back to cooking our meal ... try to forget ... to distract myself ... to stuff these thoughts and feelings.

Bless his beautiful heart, I should have known he wouldn't let that happen. I turn and he's there. He wraps his arms around me and simply says "I love you."

Something about the way he says it always transforms it from simple words into a healing balm. I feel it. I know it. I can't avoid it ..... and I'm so, so grateful for that.

I cling to him, feeling, reeling, and finally I give in to my heart. I sit down on its throne and all at once the immediate pain subsides. Just like that. I smile at him, he smiles back. He goes back to his work, and I to mine.

I'm standing at the sink again. I think of the water ... live giving ... healing. It's like love ... there's no place it can't go and no thing that will not give way to it's path. Even stone, given time will yield the path for water to travel. My heart feels like that stone tonight, and even it must yield the path for love.

I called this man to me before we even met. I called this love and summoned it forth. I am ready for it. I am willing to heal.

I think sometimes when we resist love, it's not because we "want" to resist it. It's because we want to see what will happen when we do. What will our own heart say? It's kind of like our way of checking weather we are truly ready or not. If we resist our own vulnerability and opening with our actions, will our heart speak up and say ... "I'm no longer willing to resist. I am ready to open."

If you are ready to open your heart more fully too, here are a few things I'm doing that may also support you in your own process:


An Open Heart Holds the Key to Healing
"Until we see with the eyes of the Heart, listen to the roar of the world through the ears of the Heart, and peer into the future with the comprehension of the Heart, we can never know a thing, nor will we ever be whole. The Heart unites us all, regardless of our differences, in this common understanding, and brings compassion to our troubled world. " - Agni Yoga teaching


Yoga that Opens the Heart 
Gentle backbends are a great way to encourage the heart to open as they open the front-body, including your heart, chest, throat, etc. These may be done with the support of blocks and bolsters if you choose. Bridge Pose is my favorite! It really opens me up.

A few other options include fish pose, dhanurasa, and urdhva dhanurasana.

Adding a mantra of your making, or holding an empowering image in your minds eye will really bring a rich fullness to your experience. Mine is simple: "I Am Ready to Open My Heart", and I envision a sunflower. (I used to pretend I was a sunflower growing and reaching for the sun when I was little) It connects me with my child heart.

Vibrational Allies
Working with crystals and gemstones is a great support to me. I use Emerald  & Rose Quartz together. The heart chakra resonates well to the colors of green and pink. Pink stones, such as rose quartz, resonate with the "higher" heart, or thymus chakra and assist in ones receptiveness to divine love, forgiveness, and the release of fear. Green emeralds have a lovely heart based energy and are a powerful aid for women as they bring through Goddess energy. These green stones also help us step more fully into feelings of unconditional love and compassion.

Archangel Chamuel: The Loving One
Another fabulous support to you may be found in working with Archangel Chamuel. This is the archangel of the pink ray of divine love. Simply a light one or more pink candles, hold some rose quartz, and begin praying to Chamuel. Alternatively you may lay back in a comfortable position and place the rose quartz upon your heart chakra.